


Tell Me How (This Will Ruin Us)

by LostMyHeartToHim



Series: Grindeldore one-shots [3]
Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, but it's Grindelwald so the comfort is questionable at best, make of that what you will, slight AU, the working title of this fic was "Albus saves Gellert but is angsty about it"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 02:09:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16864231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostMyHeartToHim/pseuds/LostMyHeartToHim
Summary: Albus saves Gellert from execution.





	Tell Me How (This Will Ruin Us)

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Скажи мне, как (это нас разрушит)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17201669) by [Galan_Rumos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galan_Rumos/pseuds/Galan_Rumos)



> Third fic within a short amount of time! I should call my doctor to make an appointment. There's obvs something wrong with me.
> 
> This fic takes place sometime after FBtCoG. Credence still isn't here, lol. I'm sorry, Credence.
> 
> The title is from a poem by Richard Siken because I'm a gay cliche.
> 
> Also, don't ask me how the Aurors managed to stop being incompetent for long enough to take down Grindelwald. I honestly have no idea. I like to think that Grindelwald tripped on his cloak because the mental image cracks me up.

Auror Waxley carefully approached the figure lying on the dirt, his wand ready to be drawn at a moment's notice. When he was close enough, he gave a sharp movement of his wand and ropes burst out from it. The cords wrapped themselves around the body. With bated breath, he waited for the man to spring up and start throwing around dark curses, but Grindelwald didn't even stir as the ropes tightened around him. Waxley knelt down (still keeping his distance) and waved his wand over him.

"He seems to be knocked out, Sir," Waxley pronounced after a moment's hesitation. Minister Travers came to stand alongside him, sniffing disdainfully at Grindelwald's prone form.

"Good. Tie him up. But be careful, he's a cunning bastard. I'll be damned if he fools us a second time," he ordered and then knelt on the ground, picking up Grindelwald's wand from the mud.

Waxley gave a brief nod, and together with a fellow Auror, grabbed hold of Grindelwald. They dragged him up by the arms and prepared to Disapparate to the Ministry. Before they could, Minister Travers stopped them.

"No. Stay here."

Travers exchanged puzzled glances with the other Auror. Surely the Minister would want Grindelwald behind bars as soon as possible? "Sir?"

Travers stood before the prisoner, a considering gleam in his eyes. He was twirling Grindelwald's wand around his hands. "He has escaped before," he said, before nodding to himself, seeming to come to a decision, "We will execute him."

"Sir!" Waxley gasped, aghast at the notion of killing an unconscious opponent. Even an opponent such as Grindelwald.

Travers spun to face him, a terrible look on his face.

"It's the right thing to do! Just look at the amount of destruction he has wrought!" the Minister shouted, emphasising the destruction around them with the wave of his hand. The village they stood in was barely more than dust. Walls had crumbled, and roofs had given in, and some ruins were still letting out smoke, filling the sky with ash. Bodies were lying on the ground, most of them Aurors, for, fortunately, they had managed to evacuate the villagers before the fighting had started.

Chastened, Waxley nodded nervously. "How are we going to do it, Sir?"

Travers smirked, "The Ministry has just the thing."

* * *

Albus Dumbledore drew his coat closer to him in an unconscious gesture, trying to prevent his nervousness from showing. He had heard that Gellert was in the country and that he had been in a confrontation with the ministry Aurors. An encounter which he had apparently lost - if his sources were to be believed. Albus had Apparated to the scene immediately, wanting to find out what Gellert could have positively wanted from such a seemingly inconsequential village. He could only hope that the Aurors had already taken Gellert into custody. He didn't know if his heart could take seeing him.

Stepping over a few pieces of broken wood, Dumbledore arrived at the town square where the battle had apparently taken place. His steps faltered when he spotted Gellert lying prone against the ruins of a small cottage. For a heart-stopping moment, he thought that Gellert was dead. But the ropes around him seemed to say otherwise, as did the small twitching movements of his head. Exhaling in relief (and feeling guilty about feeling relief at all), he went back to scanning the faces of the people around him. A few of them nodded and smiled at him. After a moment, he spotted Hawkins, who was an Auror and a former student of his. (He also happened to be the source of his information in most matters relating to the Auror department, but that was neither here nor there.)

Hawkins greeted him, "Professor Dumbledore."

Dumbledore smiled and walked over to him, still keeping an eye on Gellert from the corner of his eye. "Hello, Hawkins, what's happening? Why haven't they taken him in?"

"They are going to execute him, Professor. Minister's orders."

His heart stopped. _Execut-_

Before he could even finish the thought, Travers and a few of the Aurors marched to the square, making their way straight to Grindelwald.

Frozen, Albus watched as they forcibly pulled him up until he was kneeling before them. The way he swayed on place showed that he not yet regained full consciousness. Only then did Albus realise that the object the Minister was holding in his hands was a sword.

Unconsciously, Dumbledore drew out his wand.

* * *

Grindelwald was only distantly aware of the world around him. His skull was throbbing, and he could barely keep his eyes open. He felt hands pulling him up on his knees and swayed with nausea the sudden movement caused. Blurry figures stood in front of him.

Suddenly, a hand grasped his chin and pulled his face upwards. The action made him wince with pain.

"Now, Herr Grindelwald, you will answer for your crimes," the figure sneered, before releasing his hold and stepping backwards. The hands on his shoulders pushed him down, exposing his neck. Even in his current state of confusion, he realised the danger he was in and struggled against their hold. Without warning, the hands holding him disappeared and shouts of alarm rang out.

Then, it was silent. The ropes holding him loosened. With shaking hands, Grindelwald lifted himself from the ground and looked up at his unexpected saviour. His breath caught at sight.

The Aurors that had held him were strewn on the ground in all directions, unconscious but alive. The space around them was practically crackling with magic. The smell of ozone permeated the air. In the middle of it all stood Albus, wand on his hand and his eyes blazing with fury.

He was beautiful.

"I knew you were with him!" Travers shouted, enraged and afraid. He was on the ground, bound by his hand and feet, just like Grindelwald had been just moments before.

Albus didn't dignify him with an answer. Instead, he walked over to Gellert and pulled him on to his feet. He took careful hold of his head and murmured a quick healing spell. The pain muddling Grindelwald's thoughts faded to the background. The confusion of moments before was replaced by immense surprise.

Albus had just saved him from certain death.

"My dear-"

"Let's go, Gellert. Now," Albus demanded, trembling with the realisation of what he had just done. Gellert, realising that now was not the time to argue, nodded his acquiescence.

Travers continued yelling threats at them, "You will pay for this! Both of you! I will not stop until both of you are in chains!"

Gellert rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers. A gag covered the Minister's face. Much better.

Grindelwald gave a sharp flick of his wrist, and his wand flew to his outstretched hand, back to where it belonged. For a second, he considered silencing the Minister more permanently, but he didn't dare to risk Albus turning back on him again. He tucked the wand safely away in its holster before holding out a hand to Albus. Albus grasped it and, with a quiet crack, they disappeared.

* * *

Vinda was having tea with Queenie in Nurmengard's garden when Grindelwald Apparated on the courtyard. Recognising the man with him as Albus Dumbledore she jumped up and drew her wand. Grindelwald raised his hands in a placating gesture.

"No need for alarm, my girl. He's with me."

Hesitant and filled with curiosity, she sat back down. Albus Dumbledore, joining their cause? She almost expected to see Nifflers flying.

"Perhaps you would like to rest, my dear. Come, you can stay in my quarters," Grindelwald murmured to their new guest. With a hand on the small of the Professor's back, Grindelwald led him out of the courtyard.

The two women exchanged mystified glances.

* * *

When the door to Grindelwald's chambers closed, Albus immediately detached himself from his hold. He leaned his hands against a desk, shaking. He could feel Gellert moving closer to him, his hand reaching for Albus' shoulder.

"Don't. Don't touch me."

"My love-"

Dumbledore spun around, furious.

"No. You do not get to call me that. You do not get to say anything. I saved you! Not because I have forgiven you, but because as angry as I am, I have no wish to see you die!" Albus took a deep breath and continued, more quietly this time, "Not to mention that I would die soon afterwards. "

Grindelwald's face grew blank with surprise. "Die?"

"You didn't know? The blood pact bound our souls together. If one of us were to die, the other would soon follow."

At his words, Grindelwald lowered himself on a chair next to to the table, various emotions running across his face. Albus couldn't identify all of them, but what he could, made his heart sink. Guilt.

"You didn't know, did you?", Gellert's silence was all the answer he needed, "Were you planning to kill me?" he asked, his voice quiet. To his shame, he could feel tears burning his eyes. He turned away from Gellert, not wanting to show him how affected he was.

"I-"

"Do not lie to me!" Albus shouted, his voice cracking.

"Yes," Gellert admitted, "I can't afford to be distracted. And you, my dear, have always been my greatest weakness."

"Merlin, Gellert! I saved your life! I saved your life and lost my own in the process! And all this time you were planning to kill me."

Gellert threw himself from the chair, pleading. "I don't know if I could have gone through with it! I was planning it, yes, but I don't know if-"

"That you were planning it is bad enough! Leave!"

"My dear-"

Albus drew his wand, and invisible hands started to push Gellert towards the door. "Leave now!"

Albus slammed the door shut, and finally overcome, sunk into a chair and wept.

* * *

 Sighing, Grindelwald pressed his forehead against the closed door.

"Is he the reason you are doing this?"

Annoyance flashed through him at being caught in such a moment. Making sure that his Occulmency shields were in place, but allowing some of his real feelings to bleed through, he shifted to face Goldstein.

"One of them," he said, affecting vulnerability and a touch of apprehension.

Grindelwald turned to walk down the corridor and motioned for the girl to follow him. They soon reached a balcony that overlooked the valley beneath the fortress. Gellert leaned against the railing, allowing his shoulders to slump.

"You, Miss Goldstein, may be in danger of short imprisonment if you were to be caught with your No-Maj. Us? At best, we would be thrown into jail for years on end. At worst, we would be sent to a mad-house or even sentenced to death. Marriage is not even an option for us. Not anywhere," whilst he talked, he played with the rose vines that run through the railing. He plucked one and raised it to his nose, inhaling it deeply. It was sickeningly sweet. He crushed it in his palm and let the petals drift to the ground beneath his feet.

Grindelwald turned around to measure the effect his little speech was having. As predicted, the girl was practically overflowing with sympathy. Tears were welling in her eyes. It made him uncomfortable, so he averted his gaze.

Grindelwald drew his wand, caressed it with his fingers and continued, "You know, this idea of our type of relationship being wrong came from the Muggles." The wand let out a few sparks. "Before they infected our world with their backward ideas, our kind didn't have to hide. In fact, we were often valued highly in society."

This time he didn't have to fake his emotions. The rage he felt at the injustice was quite real.

"I'm sorry," the girl whispered and laid a hand on his arm. Grindelwald considered shrugging it off but decided against it. Instead, he put his own on top of it and patted her hand in a comforting gesture.

"It's quite alright, my dear. It will not always be so. I will make sure of it. When I'm done, not only will you be able to marry your muggle without persecution, we won't have to hide any longer."

The girl smiled at him, tears still glittering in her eyes. He gave a flicker of a smile in return. Soon his face darkened as his thoughts turned to the man in his quarters. This little girl he could handle, but Albus was another matter entirely. Gellert's eyes flickered to the girl. Naive though she was, she was much more practised in the art of romance than he was. Seduction he could do, but the nuances of a real relationship escaped him. Except for that long ago summer, he had never felt any need to have one. Or any need for softer emotions altogether.

But then, Albus had always been exceptional.

"Now, enough of this gloomy topic," he hesitated for a moment, disliking the idea of asking for help immensely. Grimacing, he forced himself to continue, "I was wondering if you could help me."

"Yes, of course. Anything." Naive girl.

"I'm afraid I'm not that well versed in romance. He's the only one I've ever- " Grindelwald waved his hand, not wanting to vocalise it, "So I find myself at a loss as to what to do."

Queenie bit her lip in contemplation. From the slammed door and the guilt she could feel in his thoughts, she knew he had done something to anger his companion. It would help if she knew the full circumstances of what had happened, but she was doubtful that Grindelwald would tell her. He was a very private man.

Hesitantly, she offered, "Well, an apology is usually the best place to start."

"I fear a simple apology won't cut it. Not in this instance."

Encouraged by the fact that her advice wasn't outright dismissed, she proceeded, "You need to make it clear you are being sincere. Maybe you could accompany your words with a gesture?"

A thoughtful look crossed Grindelwald's face. "A gesture? Hm, perhaps you are right. Thank you, my girl."

* * *

His tears exhausted, Albus had been listlessly staring at the wall opposite him. This was quite a mess he had gotten himself into. Various options of how to proceed run through his mind. None of them seemed viable. He could always pretend to have been Imperioused, but Dumbledore much doubted that the Minister would buy it. Travers already knew some of his past with Gellert. No doubt they would go to Godric's Hollow to find out more.

Albus ran a hand through his hair in frustration. His unconsidered action had cost him. He could never teach again, and indeed, he could never return to Britain without risking imprisonment.

But if he had not acted-

Albus had lived without Gellert for decades now, but even the thought of a world where he didn't know that Gellert was out there, still breathing, was enough to devastate him. So, yes, his choice to intervene had cost him dearly, but since the alternative couldn't even bear thinking about, he could not truly regret it. As much as he wished he could.

A knock sounded on the door.

"My dear, may I come in?" A short pause. "Please, my love."

Giving in, Albus flicked his fingers, and the door opened to reveal a contrite-looking Gellert.

Gellert walked in apprehensively, his gaze flickering from Albus to his wand lying on the table like he was expecting to be thrown out again at any moment. He knelt on the floor next to the chair Albus was still sitting on and bowed his head.

"I am sincerely sorry, my dear," he apologised, extending his wand to Albus like an offering, "For everything. For planning to kill you. I'm sorry. If you wish to retaliate, I'm yours to do what you wish."

Sighing, Albus raised Gellert's chin with his fingertips. For a moment he looked at him, cataloguing all the differences between the boy he had fallen in love with years ago and the man he was now. Even now, despite everything, it seemed he could not be rid of this curse, for a curse it felt like. More often than not, it had caused him more pain than joy. Even his happy memories of Gellert were tainted by what had happened afterwards.

He traced Gellert's jawline with his thumb. It still felt the same. _Albus_  still felt the same. It almost seemed like his heart had been frozen in time. In that long ago summer. In the feel of Geller's fingers intertwining with his own. In stolen kisses, and in hands lingering on each other's skin for a moment too long.

"I don't want revenge, Gellert," he softly admitted, "All I have ever wanted is you. Even after everything you have done. I don't know what that makes me. But it's the truth."

Gellert put away the wand and sat forward. His hand reached for Albus' face, and this time, he let him do it. Albus closed his eyes as his head was cradled within familiar hands. A tear tracked down his cheek. Gellert made a shushing noise and pressed his forehead against his.

"Why can't I let you go?" Albus whispered, "I wish I knew how to quit you."

Instead of answering Gellert started pressing small kisses on the corner of his eye. More tears tracked down Albus' face as he pressed his face against the black fabric of Gellert's cloak.

"I hate you," he whispered, wishing with all his heart that he could mean it. Maybe then this would all be easier.

"No, you don't," Gellert whispered back.

**Author's Note:**

> Why didn't they just Avada Kevadra him, you might ask?
> 
> Idk, why do the ministry have soul-sucking monsters guarding their prison? Why do they have a weird execution portal in their basement? Why is the one spell that causes painless death considered evil? 
> 
> The Wizarding World is full of drama queens, that's why.
> 
> (jk, the real reason is that I needed to happen like that for the story. please suspend your disbelief, lol)
> 
> Also, yo, Grindels, maybe asking the girl who drugged her bf for dating advice is not the best idea. Just because it worked this time doesn't mean it always will. Just sayin'. 
> 
> And, yes, that was an obvious Brokeback Mountain reference, because it, like Grindeldore, is also very gay and very sad.
> 
> Anyhow, thanks for reading! Please leave a comment if you enjoyed it! Comments feed my soul.
> 
> Edit: if anyone is interested, there's a conversation about Grindelwald's motivation in the comments


End file.
